rat race.

i took the 608 bus home, took a taxi to chase the 608 and took a 608 bus home. haha.

I will scratch your face

busy busy busy i have been since school started but im kinda loving it.

anyway, last night there was uninvited guests in the neighbour.

1.37 am while i was doing research for my assignments, i heard 5 honks, it was annoying and i thought to myself what on earth is going on honking 5 times at this hour but i didnt get off my chair.

1.39am, 5 honks again, and 5 pretty long honks each. i said what the F*** is going on and WHO THE F**** is that, acting so inconsiderately, in a private estate? Went to the window and i saw a black car parked outside the gate of the neighbouring condo, stared at the car to see what was really going on, managed to figure out that there was someone in the car but not knowing what the hell they are doing.

1.40am, 5 honks again. I said to myself, i think they are really crazy, do they know what they are doing, i had this huge impulsiveness to rush down and bang on their window but i saw my security guard taking notice so i guess he would do what i do if they do it again.

1.43am, 5 honks, driver got off the car, stood next to the car while taking on the phone, driver got in, passenger got out went to the gate to intercom so the unit owner could open the gate for them.

1.45am, they drove in.

1.46am, i regretted not going down and give them a piece of my mind. because i think some people just need to be scolded.

If your bf or whatsoever betrayed you or whatsoever and you rushed down from wherever to our private estate, trying to get in with inconsiderate methods, please bear in mind that i and im sure WE do not and would not have to bear the shit that was supposedly for tbe shiter or shit eater itself.

it be private or non private, or however angry you might be, there are many many people and babies sleeping at this hour and your honking might scare the babies up. and your honking would be a disturbance to people that were still up and trying to work on their inspirations.

Next time when you want to come over again please be reminded that, here in this neighbour, there is a cat that never sleeps and doesnt like nonsense or disturbance.

If you do that again, she will scratch you, your face.

sometimes i worry too much and think too far. sometimes i remind and console myself by telling myself that its alright and everything is going to be fine, its not too long a time that i would be living.

first attempt to drive on the road without my dad in the car. i drove the girls home after a night of dinner, frida, creation of red and shocking pink and laughters.

i never felt that strange sense of nervousness in my life. never. the feeling of worrying about endangering two lives, not myself. to make sure they get home safe and feel safe on the journey back did not slip once out of my mind once while we were on the road. to be honest, my hands were cold and i was truly nervous. an image of my brother on the bed before he closed his eyes to the living world flashed in my mind and i begin to realise the reason of my unfounded fear. perhaps because i had seen my dearest's death so close to me before, i truly understand how fragile life is and that we are merely weak bodies.....

at the red light, i saw a transformation. a different part of me, a different driver from when i was learning and having a L plate. many things that i would be too lazy to do, i did them last night. i obeyed as much rules and safety as i could to keep them safe and knowing that they two would soon embark on learning driving soon like i myself once, i didnt want to set a bad example for reckless or overconfident driving even though im no expert and just a new young driver.

dropped delly (last passenger) safely down and i truly felt a sense of relief. there, i was off for my home.

the next thing i know, my hands were warm and i vromed. with attempt of reminding myself to now keep MY own life,

safe.

we were eating macdonalds sharing our burgers, filet-o-fish & double cheese.

he passed the half bitten double cheese over to me and i picked it up, biting off another mouth off it.

lifted my hand held burger and showing it at his face.

me: what does it look like?
he: hmmm..... pussy?
me: no......
he: hmm... dick? ( looks alittle like one to be honest)
me: noo......... hahahahah. do you want to give up? say give up if you want.
he: give up.... what?
me: it looks like a half eaten burger! hahahahahahahaha
he: .............................

he thinks my joke is not funny and corny. do you think its funny, dont you think its funny.

its funny because he fell for my trap just how i predicted his answers to be everything and anything but the burger.

me: do you think its funny, why didnt you laugh..
he: because its not funny.. its corny.
me: why is it not funny! its funny because you fell for it like how i predicted you would and most people would.
he: your jokes are either for people like very young children or people whom are very intelligent.
me: .........................
he: ill ask herman if its funny. you ask del and ana, they probably agree with me.
me: ........................... hahaha. you're stupid.

haha...............

roaring like a bunny

have you ever ever been very frustrated for no particularly reasonable reason. Grumpy like an angry bear woken up from nap, have you? its not a usual thing but it just hit the spot and you cant help but to keep roaring around to yourself for no reason like a bunny gone wrong.

and grumpy because its late at night and you have not showered and feel too irritated to shower.

i was one last night and i felt like hanging myself with mee sua.

yet he managed to calm the grumpy roaring bunny down over the phone with some patience. got it to shower too.

as i was lying on bed and listening to anita baker on the radio, some warm and happy tears rolled down my cheeks.

Thank you.....

*ps. just this moment as im about to publish this post, the arcade fire song plays on my itunes.....................

Oh no.......

get the oh oh out.

someone please get this oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh oh out of my head. i find myself singing oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh after i go to the toilet, when im walking to get a cup of water, after i finish doing something. its as though oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh oh from Arcane Fire- Wake up is my national anthem to my start and end of doing something.

it is just really very irritating.

especially when i do not feel for or like this particular song all that much.

urgh...